It came to me like a wave
as I opened my eyes
- pounding from the back
the light streaked in
between the blinds
reprimanding that the day
was already half gone
I remembered my own
words from the night before
spoken gregariously
over pint half empty
and glass puddling what
were once cubes of ice
- I had just drunk
the last of the whisky
flavored water
wanting to get every
last drop from the glass
I closed my eyes again
my mind racing through thick molasses
- why again was I such a fool
- what must they think of me
This ritual of Saturday morning
- chest burning with acid
mixed with shame
- I wondered to myself if I
would ever make it stop
Crawling out of bed
I dressed and wondered if I should
call and apologize, or just
walk down to the pub
and start again
This is a sad reality for some folks. I went down this path when i came back from Iraq, endless drinking. Trying to forget and yet trying to remember. We we’re gone so long i had forgot what the US felt like. Thanks for this piece.
We drink to take away the madness, yet for some of us it just creates more madness every time. Insanity means doing the same thing over and over again expecting a different result. Expectations can lead to premeditated resentments, and those almost always lead us down the path of alcohol again. What a great piece, and an excellent example of true insanity.